1) Take an Advil - At the very least it can be a placebo and at the very best it can actually help cure the pain of your hangover. Keep one of these by your bed or in your back pocket (in case of away games).
2) Scrape your Tongue - You probably drank a mixture of different alcohol and sweet chasers that left a ton of residue on your tongue. You also undoubtable ate some late night food that has planted itself on your tongue. Gotta get rid of all that evil but scraping your tongue with a tongue scraper.
3) Drink a bottle of water - Hydration is key. You want to drink so you can pee all of those toxins out of your body. Drink a bottle of water and don't hold in that pee because you're too lazy to make it to the bathroom.
4) Take a poop - Another form of cleansing your system of the naughty things you may have put into your body. Take a seat and scroll though Instagram for a little. Take some time to think about the decisions you made last night and how you'll improve in the future.
5) Take a shower - shine your shoes, you got no time to lose. No, but seriously take a nice hot shower and you should be back to about 93% if you follow these steps in this order.